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Kids Jokes - Police Jokes

Speeding Excuses


There aren't a whole lot of speeding excuses that are new to State Patrol troopers. Following are several favorites that were submitted to the Lincoln Journal Star:

Patrol Sgt. Chuck Buckingham heard one of his favorites after pulling over someone going more than 70 mph. The driver claimed a grasshopper had landed on the windshield as the couple in the car left town, so they decided to see how fast they could go before the grasshopper blew off. During the stop, the grasshopper was still on the car.

Trooper Sam Winters pulled over a young man in Banner County who explained, "Officer I have a hot date tonight in Scottsbluff, and if you'd seen this girl, you'd be speeding too."

Someone tried an understanding approach with Trooper Fred Bastron. Bastron stopped a woman for speeding in a Lincoln Continental. She explained with the car's 4.6 liter engine, it "just wants to go and go." Bastron said the engine was the same one his patrol car had. "Well, you know what I'm up against then," she said.

Lt. Howard Cofer of the State Patrol said he pulled over a speeder doing 85 mph. The man explained he was trying to return the car early to save $100. The fine for speeding was $100 plus court costs.

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