Ask for a raise joke
Sam walks into his boss's office. "Sir, I'll be straight with you, I know the economy isn't great, but I have over three companies after me, and I would like to respectfully ask for a raise." After a few minutes of haggling the boss finally agrees to a 5% raise, and Sam happily gets up to leave.
"By the way", asks the boss as Sam is getting up, "which three companies are after you?" "The electric company, water company, and phone company", Sam replied.